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"You cannot say you've lost a friend. If a friendship is capable of ending, it is because it never existed."
Mike Swanzy and Eric Haar
Where did all of the years go?
Ahh FRIENDSHIPS. I used to wonder if I was just a bad person, because I have had so many failed relationships in my life, I am starting to wonder if it is really me that is usually at fault. But, then again, maybe the other person was just to blame, and there was nothing I could have done to made the outcome of friendships gone any differently.
People and friends come and quickly go, but memories are forever. Time is never worth wasting and friendships are tested when trust is broken or never given. I suppose the same holds true for relationships. However, friendships seems to be the theme for today, thanks to Laura Arbaugh.
I remember way back when I had my two best friends, known them since they were born. I was born July 15, 1978, Michael Swanzy was born mid-August, and Eric Haar was born September 6, 1978. We all lived within 3 houses of each other. We grew up raising hell together. We were typical boys. We did everything together. Our entire lives were filled with memories of each other doing stuff together. There was the year or two that Eric and I went to tennis camp together, and learned about what “Sunrises” were. We were experiencing the high of making yourself pass out through hyperventilation. There was the other time when we were teenagers, when we had some interesting times.
Michael and I used to play Roller Coaster Tycoon for days on end, developing some kick ass rides. Michael was into roller coasters long before he was into hard rock. We got into computer hacking programs which generated credit card numbers, so we could call phone sex hot lines, which was before Internet porn and cybersex existed. Before we were successful, his mom overheard our phone conversation and we got into a shit load of trouble.
The world was such a different place back then, so was my life. All three of us were inseparable, we were always having fun, we were comrades. We would take a bullet for each other.
Then at some point, around the teenage years, we all starting heading down different paths. Mike Swanzy started down the “punk rock” path. He was dying his hair different colors and worshiping Marilyn Manson, LOL. That was not my style, but we were still boys, as we blossomed into our teenage years, we maintained limited contact. I don't know about Michael and Eric's relationship at that time, because I was in and out of jail, the legal system, Court, mental hospitals, and even a homeless shelter, during my teenage years. Yeah, my life was fucked up. So we lost touch over the time I was 16 to about 21.
When I was able to regain control of my life and find something positive to focus my energy on doing, other than getting into typical teenage trouble, we had lost touch again. But along came MySpace, and it became really easy to reconnect with people again. MySpace a social networking website, took off virally. I found both, Mike Swanzy and Eric Haar, on there. Michael had said he had a fall out with Eric, over something petty I'm sure, and stopped talking again. Then before you know it, Michael deleted a comment I left him about his Halloween costume, so that he only had comments from all his “Groupies” could follow him. Did I mention Mike has been in a band every since I could remember? It was always his dream to become the next music superstar. I wouldn't be surprised if he even tried out for American Idol. What was that band name again? Atrophy. Man, it has been years since I talked to him after the incident where he removed my comment. His best friend, from birth, leaves him a positive remark, and he deleted it so the “Groupies” could overshadow me. That was pretty fucked up, and one email led to another and the next thing you know we stopped talking. I don't even really remember what happened with Eric. I'm sure that one was probably my fault. I'll take the blame, even if it wasn't mine. All I remember is sending Eric an e-mail saying, “Michael was right, you are a fat ass.”. That was at the same time the Swanzy relationship fell apart.
The one thing the three of us always had was TRUST. We have had our share of quarrels, but we USED to be able to pick up the phone after not speaking for a while and say, “Hey, we were boys, let's put this shit behind us, and move on.” That is something that not everyone has. Swanzy doesn't seem to care about 20 years of friendship anymore, he doesn't want to put anything behind him and move on. He has too many new friends, followers, and groupies. He doesn't want my friendship anymore.
There are WAY TOO MANY people who I have told to, “Go Fuck Yourself, and get out of my life.” And just as fast as they came into my life, they were gone again. There have been many friendships, that have started to take hold after a year or two, and failed as well. These are the friendships, where it was obviously still undecided as to whether each side wanted the friendship to continue. For whatever reasons, they failed after several of seemingly successful years of positive direction. These are the one's that leave good memories, but know that the other party burned you when it mattered most. You are not at fault, and you try not to blame them, but you couldn't do anything else.
When is it time to UNfriend? Serena Todd you SUCK.
Unfriend, beat out sexting and hashtag to become Oxford's word of the year. Some debate that it should be defriend, instead of unfriend. In 1994, Oxford's word was metrosexual. 1999's word was blogger. The word of the year in 2000, was "bling".
Back when the economy looked like the sky was the limit, I remember we had this one friend, Serena Todd who was a single mom of two. Serena Todd wrecked her car drunk, and had no insurance, and we felt like we could do something to help a hardworking single mom, and we bought her a car so she could get to work and keep her job to keep supporting those kids.
It was our way of contributing positively to another child's life, without having to raise that child. I guess you could call it some psychological term, but helping another person's or couple's kid makes you feel good, and you don't have to deal with actually having another child to raise, or the expense.
Anyway, Serena Todd burned us. She didn't pay a single dollar back to us and fled to Texas, taking the car, and didn't even say good-bye. Her MySpace profile list Cross Plains, TX as her location. She took advantage of our generosity and kindess. Obviously, we don't talk anymore. She didn't deserve our trust or friendship.
Today friendships are the same as always. Rocky. It's truly fascinating watching people trying to get ahead in the world, but burning bridges everywhere they go. I have been fortunate and always kept the one's that mattered the most. Isn't that what life is about? Six Degrees of Separation? It is all about who you know, and who can get you the most, the fastest and cheapest, and getting things done that you can't typically do on your own.
I have two other friendships that I know I will take to the grave. Thankfully, one seems to be my wife's. I won't be on non-speaking terms with them no matter what life brings. I have pretty much been through everything that a human being could ever imagine, and yet I'm still here and out of jail. I must have done something right. Maybe it was everyone else's fault and not mine. LOL.
I know that in this day and age, where Americans are a different breed of personality, true friendship is hard to find. This article was inspired by a relationship and friendship that might fail today, but that caused me to write this and reconnect with Eric Haar again today on Facebook. Wonder if he will be my "friend" again. So if the one friendship fails, maybe I will regain a more important one?
The funniest part is that when anyone searches for Michael Swanzy, Laura Arbaugh, Brooke Baltz, or Eric Haar, or Cara Wrobel on Google, people will probably find this article on friendship about them before anything else. It should take Google approximately 2-4 weeks for this to reach the TOP 10 Google search results for their names.
Cara Wrobel, Brooke Baltz, Alex Stewart
Who ever reads this will know that I still think highly of both of them. Google is a powerful tools for when people search for your name, especially if you do not have a common first name and unique last name. McAnneny, Haar, Arbaugh, and Swanzy last names are all pretty much one in a million, even with common first names such as Chris, Eric, and Michael. McAnneny already knows how I feel about him.
The girl that inspired this article, Laura Arbaugh, is the most selfish bitch I have ever met. I designed her mom a website, I hooked the girl up with computer and Internet repairs, and the way she thanks me is by betraying me like Serena Todd did. You can only be betrayed if you trust. Laura Arbaugh does not deserve my trust, nor anyone else's. Laura Arbaugh can go to hell. If she couldn't trust someone who had fought for her from day one, then I couldn't trust her either. Her birthday is January 14, 1982 and she is from Staunton, VA. Tell Laura Arbaugh I said "Hi." and to kiss my ass.
Eric accepted my friend request. Michael and Eric apparently reconciled their differences on Facebook. Michael decided to become friends with 7 other people I knew on Facebook, but was too stubborn to request me to be his friend. This article reached the TOP 10 on Google in 15 days. Isn't life funny? You see a NAME is a powerful thing. LOL. Smile, we'll make you famous.
Brooke Baltz is a great example of a friendship that almost was. We went out with Brooke Baltz one time and later connected with her via Facebook. I tried emailing Brooke several times about all getting together again, but my emails keep getting ignored. I thought she would end up being someone that we could have a good time with. The interesting part was that Brooke Baltz never deleted me from her friends, but never responded to any of my emails, so I eventually "unfriended" her.
It has now been more than a year since we have seen Brooke Baltz, and I chalk up the relationship with Brooke as one that could have been. She is extremely attractive, funny, outgoing, and intelligent. I have no idea why she didn't want to become more than just an acquaintance. Maybe one day Brooke Baltz will finally send me an email and explain what it was that made her keep her distance. I wish Brooke Baltz the best in her future. She was an acquaintance that never developed into a friendship.
Cara Wrobel is like my little sister. I reconnected with her via Facebook, after about 12 years of not knowing how she has been. Cara Wrobel used to live on the street behind ours, and her and my sister we somewhat of best friends. Cara may have had better friends than my sister, but they were close friends. Cara Wrobel's personality was always one of my favorites. Cara is a popular girl. I would give Cara Wrobel a reference if she ever needed it for anything, but popular people don't usually need references.
She has more than 450 friends on Facebook. Cara Wrobel and Mike Swanzy are Facebook friends, but Mike Swanzy is still being a prick, and wants nothing to do with me. I would guess that Cara Wrobel and Mike Swanzy became friends, sometime in High School maybe. I think Cara Wrobel likes me better than Mike anyway, he can keep on being stubborn. I could have helped Atrophy and his band or whatever else he wanted, if he had decided to renew our friendship. Maybe he is upset that I called Atrophy's clique of women, groupies.
I have always wanted to help a band succeed on the Internet. There are so many bands, rappers, and musical talents out there, that just need some good exposure. Alex Stewart used to be in a band called Hot Vegas. Alex Stewart and I used to be friends for a long time. He was one of the best employees that my wife's fence company had. We even have a Hot Vegas tee shirt, that I wore the other day. Hot Vegas produced much better music than Atrophy and had better marketing as well. Alex Stewart's band never let me manage their online marketing. It's okay, its Hot Vegas and Mike Swanzy's loss, not mine. I will find some band or musical talent to make successful online someday.
Another update, I made a couple comments on Cara Wrobel's Facebook page, joking about Mike Swanzy trying out for American Idol and how he didn't make the cut. I emailed Mike and pointed him to the fact that I was talking trash about him and proceeded to tell him that I actually missed him. He actually finally responded this time! He basically told me to that he "didn't care" and to fuck off and go play with my son. It's okay, I would rather be friends with Cara Wrobel over him anyway, Cara at least has class.
Time flies, passes by.
One name and relationship that I will never forgot was my former manager at a company. I thought that he was my friend, but sometimes business relationships, and friendships, are sometimes world's apart from each other. I guess he couldn't have been my friend, or we would have interacted outside from our work environment. However, we used to have so much fun at work together. I learned a lot from him and I emailed him about a year or so ago to see how he was doing, but he either never got my email, or chose not to respond to it. His name is also one in a million. I didn't find him on Facebook but I found where he works where he is a Network Systems Engineer.
Unfortunately for his company and him, his about him page has a PageRank is not ranked by Google. His employer, an accounting firm, homepage has a PageRank is a 4, which is actually pretty good. I think it has been close to eight years since I last connected with my ex-boss. It is too bad that he didn't want to hear from me, I was hoping to re-network with him after all of these years, he was really someone that I looked up to, and thought that I could reconnect with and develop a new business relationship or friendship with. I guess I was wrong, it has been known to happen from time to time.